I find myself hungry for trails, for thick comfy socks and pulling on my hiking shoes over 'em. I want my lungs full of high-up mountain air and snow fields, and toasty chai smell wafting from my morning mug. I am really missing that feeling of cold air in the tent, and slumbering into day time hiking clothes, with the swaying creaks of my backpack on my back. It is good to have that hunger in my heart. I used to feel this deep sadness about the Missing: all the things and birthdays and sleep I would miss during residency. But I think God is strongly and purposefully draining that well of sadness, and is determined to fill me up with deeper joy, with a settled calm that there is no such thing as total Missing. There has been so much goodness the last 7 months: moving to Portland, Joe and I taking these new amazing jobs, our first beautiful home together, lake days and hiking trips, exploring Ptown and the many delicioso fooderies... This strikes me as a real season of gratefulness. There is so much fullness, even if sometimes I think there isn't time in the day or month for all that I want to do. And the list of happy things yet to do is inspiring: hiking in snowy red rock Bryce Canyon, scuba diving in in the warm Bahamas, and all the close to home stuff: go to the infamous sushi place in our town where the line wraps around the corner, rent kayaks and paddle along the Willamette River from the park down the street, and an always favorite....sleep in on Saturdays and shuffle down to Grand Central Bakery for a bread pudding muffin and a coffee.